On Air Now
Cowan's Classics with Rob Cowan 7pm - 9pm
Some are weird, some are ridiculous, some are cheesy - it seems that as soon as you put classical music into stock photos, it looks horrendous. Here are some of the worst generic photos of musicians and classical music in general that we've come across. The horror...
Because sometimes, you just need to glissando. And bathe.
"Seriously, he's useless at the piano. He just dribbles."
Iceland were unable to provide transport to the Eurovision Song Contest for their musicians this year.
Maybe he'd drop in some more money if your violin was round the right way.
Sometimes, I like to use my cello to block out the horrors of real life. Just for fun, y'know.
My love is like a red, red rose. With a trumpet. And a cane.
OK. Does anyone have ANY idea what's happening here?
Because the park is the most natural place in the world you'd expect to find a sunglasses-wearing trombonist. In a fisherman's beanie hat.
"Playing naked just really allows me to feel the music, you know?"
Practice is over, pal. Go home.
Wow, seriously, if you want some time alone, just say...
This is how REAL musicians get famous.
We're not flute experts, but we're pretty sure you need to have at least some of your fingers on the keys to make it work.
We can excuse some freedom of realism, but this is some of the worst violin technique we've ever seen. Call that a bowgrip? And you should be bowing IN FRONT of the fingerboard. Madam, whoever your teacher is, you need to sack them.
This is how they do piano lessons in Eli Roth movies.
Even cellists aren't safe! Watch out for the weird light!
Someone think of the children!
...it's going. Panic over.
Unless Baz Luhrmann is planning on remaking 'A Late Quartet'.
Another foray into the great outdoors. Perfect time for a Bach Partita, obvs.
Top marks for effort. We're terrified.
"Shine your shoes for a penny, suh?"
What every girl wants. Flowers and a clarinet.
Another nap in the park with that staple of outdoor pursuits, the violin.
...it's a violin.
Extreme Strictly Come Dancing.
"OK, carry on." Nice hair flick, too.
If a man plays a tiny white violin in the woods, does it make a sound?
Give a flute to a cellist, this is what you get.