The 8 best things about playing the trombone

14 October 2015, 10:52 | Updated: 6 January 2017, 14:45

What do you call someone who knows how to play the trombone but doesn’t? A complete fool is what. Here are just some of the reasons that playing the 'bone is the absolute best.

1 Not to be all smug and everything, but we have a SLIDER.

A SLIDER, we tell you. None of this bow or keys nonsense. A slider is easily the coolest way to play notes. And also makes for great GoPro footage.

2 It doubles as a flamethrower

Really.

And there's plenty more of that here…

3 Wagner

Brass players love Wagner. He really appreciated our skills. Take pretty much any section of his epic four-part Ring cycle and it’s all:

Want to know what we're talking about? Watch this pretty mean performance by Simon Rattle and the Orchestra of the Age of Enlightenment here)

4 While we’re on the subject of composers…

Can we take a moment to appreciate the full-on sexiness of this moment from Ravel’s Bolero.

Just listen to that super-hot trombone action at 10.40 (or, y'know, you can listen to the whole thing).

5 Playing a trombone while on a Vespa

How do you make riding a Vespa even cooler? Do it while using a trombone to provide sound-effects. Obvi.

6 Playing a trombone while skiing

How do you combine your love of alpine descents with your enthusiasm for Bruckner? This lad shows the way…

7 Cows love a trombonist

Seriously. We’re like the musical version of the horse whisperer. Except with cows.

8 And finally… sneezes

Because which other instrument can provide quite as much hilarity? 

[helpless laughter]