Overheard at the symphony: funniest audience comments at a classical concert

8 January 2021, 11:19

Funniest comments at a classical concert
Funniest comments at a classical concert. Picture: Getty/Instagram/Classic FM

By Maddy Shaw Roberts

‘Chopin? I thought he was taking me shopping!’

As many of us sit at home, missing the days of attending live performances, we thought it might be fun to reminisce about some of the lighter experiences we’ve had while sitting in an auditorium waiting for some Brahms and Beethoven.

Accordingly, we put out this request:

And you didn’t let us down. We got some fantastic anecdotes – and have compiled some of our favourites. Here are the most wonderfully ridiculous comments you’ve overheard at an opera or classical concert...

– [While the orchestra is tuning] “I don’t know the name of this piece, but they always open with it.”

– [Before a performance of Pachelbel’s Canon] “What do you mean there is no cannon? That’s the only reason I came to this thing!”

– [During a performance of Turandot, after ‘Nessun Dorma’]: “The guy playing Pavarotti didn’t even look like him”

– [Before a performance of Schubert’s ‘Unfinished’ Symphony] “Are we supposed to clap at the end, or...?”

– [At a Beethoven concert] “And which one of them is Beethoven?”

– [After a concert of Mozart symphonies] “I thought there would be some singing as well.”

– “My husband has a very loud sneeze. We were at a piano concert and when he sneezed, one of the pianists was startled right off the piano bench.”

– [A child at a performance of Rhapsody in Blue] “They stole the airplane commercial music!”

– [A child listening to the Dvořák Cello Concerto] “Daddy, can we go home when the old man has sawed through the box?”

– [A small child in the Royal Opera House foyer before a family performance] “But mummy, will they sing *all* the time?”

– [Woman on the phone during the interval of a concert where Krystian Zimmerman was playing Chopin] “I thought he was taking me shopping.”

– [Boy talking to his mum] “Why do they have to taste the wood thing before they tie it to their instrument? Does it taste good? What flavours do they have?”

– [During a performance of Aida] “A man in front of me slept through the whole thing, woke up right at the imprisonment and loudly asked ‘What happened? Did someone die?’”

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