Now Playing

This song proves it's impossible to sing and play double bass at the same time

7 March 2017, 16:05 | Updated: 7 March 2017, 17:01

By Amy MacKenzie

Preposterous. Absurd. Ludicrous. Jay Leonhart proves that it really is impossible.

Don't even try it yourself. As we said, it's impossible.

Even the outstanding bass player Jay Leonhart can't sing and play double bass:

If you aren't quite keeping up, then now is probably the time to explain. It's Impossible To Sing And Play The Bass is a piece written intentionally to test the mind and fingers. There are complex rhythms happening between the vocal and bass lines which require extreme concentration and technical expertise.

If you still haven't quite cottoned on to the irony, here's the lyrics written by performer Jay Leonhart, who has been writing and singing his own very individualistic songs about his life as a bass player over the years:

Let me tell you some thing as we start the show
It's a little some thing I thought you should know
So I will tell you as we settle in to place
It's impossible to sing and play the bass
You're a lovely group of people you deserve the courtesy
Of knowing what you can expect of me
I have practiced but it will not mean a thing 'cause
It's impossible to play the bass and sing
You see the bass is fretless it's not like a guitar
On bass you spend your whole life wondering where the
hell you are
It's got no little markers just a finger board so bare
And lots of notes that often are not there
Then when you start singing you've got lyrics on your mind
And the notes on bass become impossible to find
To remember lyrics melodies bass lines and chords
Is no less a miracle than Lourdes
So as I make a thousand errors sit there and be kind
Do not throw tomatoes at me keep this all in mind
Remember this is serious remember this is art
Remember this or I will fall apart
Then I'd have to pray to God to come and intercede
And she'd only sit and laugh at my wanton greed
She made the rules for molecules atoms time and space
And she knows it's impossible to sing and play the bass