Your insides. They are liquid now.
Merry Cringe-mas everyone! Take a look at six videos where the classical music world got it wrong at Christmas time...
1. Yoko Oh-No
John Lennon and Yoko Ono's Vietnam-era peace activist anthem 'Happy Christmas (War is Over)' gets the Three Tenors treatment. "I 'ope you 'av fun" bellows the mighty Pavarotti. Hate to break it to you, Luciano...
2. Going like the clappers
Irving Berlin's 'White Christmas' has never been performed with more tintinnabulous earnestness and precision than by this black-gloved handbell ringer and his plucky chum.
3. 'Tis the season to be jolly
André is the ultimate showman, especially here as he puts down his fiddle to join a choir of delighted children for that infectious 'Fa la la la la' refrain. Then he hits them on the head with his bow. The cheeky sausage.
4. Twelve glasses ringing...
There's something slightly unnerving about these bare, disembodied arms and up-curled, moistened fingers intoning 'The 12 Days of Christmas'. To be fair, though, it's pitch perfect.
5. Juan's Christmas treasure hunt
There's no doubting Juan Diego Florez's beautiful voice but sinister mysteries abound in this clip: who has been stealing the nativity figures and hiding them all around the garden? And who went to the trouble of painting the pomegranate gold? And why is Juan so unperturbed by all this mischief?
6. A world of dread and fear
Oh Paul Potts, what happened here? At what point did it seem like a good idea to sing 'Do They Know It's Christmas' on German TV with a host of conference league Europop acts? At least he looks ashamed of himself.