9 signs you're beginning to like classical music
18 September 2017, 14:55
Do you think you might be falling in love with classical music? Here are the tell-tale signs...
1. Four Seasons is no longer just a pizza flavour to you
"Delicious and an advanced use of the concerto format!"
2. You air conduct without realising
"What? No, I always flail my arms around like that. Always."
3. You start to really connect with the intro of 'Bad Romance'
"Yeah, the song's not bad, but what's that delightful harpsichord sound I hear…?"
4. You like your morning-hair because it makes you look like Beethoven
"I'm not even going to comb it. That's awesome."
5. Your faith in believable drama plots disappears
"So it was his wife all along, she was dressed up as a male prison warden and he didn't notice… seems legit."
6. You think the disco version of Beethoven's 5th is lacking in gravitas
"When the organ solo comes in I just want to curl up on the floor and cry."
7. The Champions League music suddenly has nothing to do with football
"It's Zadok the Priest, not Zadok the stocky full-back."
8. You continually compare your children to Mozart and force them into piano lessons
"Mozart didn't give up when his hands started to look like talons, did he?"
9. You realise Maastricht is not just some city in the Netherlands where that treaty was signed
"Oh André, with your hair and your concerts and your castle… how I long to visit."
But seriously, you'd actually love to visit.
If you recognise at least five of these signs, you are officially a classical music lover. Welcome to the fold...